We have made Christianity a religion that says “follow Jesus and you will find a life of comfort, convenience and worldly blessings”. This is NOT the gospel of the Kingdom. In fact, Jesus makes it clear that there is nothing comfortable about following the Way.
Do you truly desire intimate fellowship with the Living God? We are quick to say “yes”, but even Jesus tells us in Luke chapter 14 to count the cost. He warns us that “those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples” (v33). Realize He is not just referring to our willingness to give up material possessions. He includes relationships, positions of respect and power, even our very “reputation”.
Again, do you really desire intimate fellowship with the Living God? Are you willing to let Him examine the depths of your soul and reveal to you those “things” you still value more than Him? Are you willing to let Him strip you naked of those competing interests?
These “things” aren’t necessarily evil in and of themselves. It could be your desire for a healthy marriage, a meaningful job, enough income to make ends meet, a strong relationship with your children, respect from your colleagues, respect in your church, or physical well-being and safety. Yet any one of these desires can hold a higher position in your heart than fellowship with God.
At times, we want to “use” our relationship with Jesus as a possible means to get these desires. We think, if I pray more; if I am more faithful in giving and service; if I read the Bible more, then maybe God will “grant me the desires of my heart”.
The only way to loosen the hold these “desires” have over our hearts and motivations is to walk the way of the Cross. By willingly surrendering our lives to the One who loves us beyond measure, we experience true victory. This victory is not a deliverance from circumstances - it’s the delight in our soul that remains despite the circumstances. This only happens when our greatest delight, our highest goal, our “pearl of great price” is communion with God.
Again, victory is not deliverance from our circumstances, its deliverance from our condition - the state of our flesh that values the “blessings of God” above communion with God.
When you value any of these things more than God Himself, you will not allow Him to be Lord over the outcomes - you will wrestle for control. You will become a slave to the lesser things of this life.
Jesus makes it clear, to be His disciple you must be willing to surrender it all. It is the only way these desires will lose their power over you. We must be willing to leave the cares of this world behind and enter into ever-increasing communion with Him - allowing Him to truly be God over every circumstance in our lives. That is the Way to abundant life. It’s costly, it’s messy, it’s even painful at times, but it is worth it!
"Joy" is a powerful fruit of the spirit. In fact, the joy of the Lord is our strength. When our joy is rooted in relationship with Christ (not our circumstances), we overcome life's difficulties by remaining confident in God’s heart to work all things for good.
So how do we cultivate the fruit of lasting joy? Joy is produced in the soil of gratitude and praise. Thanksgiving and worship are keys to joy. We manifest a joyful spirit when our primary focus is God and His blessings.
The trouble is few of us take time to reflect on the "goodness" of the Lord. We fail to let his praise be continually on our lips. Instead, we are too busy complaining about everything we don't like. This produces the fruits of bitterness, depression and negativity - not joy!
No matter what we are going through in life, there is always a reason for thanksgiving. Everyday offers a multitude of opportunities to thank God and praise Him for His goodness. If we look for them, we will find them.
The following exercises can help you cultivate "an attitude of gratitude and praise". Have a trusted family member, friend, or leader hold you accountable for your progress. Soon you will find it natural to live in unshakeable joy.
1. For one week - track the number of times you complain, whine or argue with God about your circumstances. This will help you see just how much negativity influences you. Repent and make a decision to praise God instead.
2. Train yourself to speak praise to God when tempted to complain instead. Invite Him to open your eyes to see things from a new perspective.
3. Create a "thanksgiving list". Every night journal a minimum of 10 things you are thankful for - do not repeat anything on your list.
4. Practice expressing gratitude to others throughout the day. Do not take another’s kindness for granted.
5. Think about 3 people who have had a positive impact on your life - write them each a detailed letter of appreciation.
6. Reflect upon a difficult circumstance in your past - journal how God has been able to bring good about as a result.
7. Tape up poster board in a common area of your home - invite others to write something they are thankful for on the board. See how many you can list as a family.
8. Share a personal testimony of God's goodness with others.
9. Write a personal song of praise and thanksgiving to the Lord.
10. Memorize and meditate on Scriptures concerning thanksgiving and praise.
“Do you want to get well?” It must have been a peculiar interchange – Jesus, asking the paralyzed man at the pool of Bethesda if he truly wanted his life to be different (see John 5). After all, this man had been paralyzed for thirty eight long years. Who would want to stay in such a miserable condition?
Yet Jesus asks, “Do you want to get well?” And so the man explains why he has not yet accomplished this goal. No one will help him. He is unable to overcome the obstacles of his circumstance. He is a victim of an unfortunate situation.
Surely the man wanted to be well – right? After all, why else would he be waiting at the pool where the stirring waters could heal him? Yet, Jesus asks him all the same. Could it be that Jesus saw something beyond what was presented? Could it be that this man really didn’t want to change after all?
And so it is with us! We say we want a life that is different from the one we are currently experiencing. We want a stronger relationship with God. We long for greater intimacy with our family. We want a better career. We desire to have a greater impact on our children. We hope to make positive contributions to the world around us – and so on.
There are many situations we wish were different. We want the circumstances changed, but refuse to deal with the one constant in all of them – ourselves. Just like the paralytic at the pool, as long as our solutions remain outside our control, we have an excuse to settle for life as we know it. Yet we maintain the pretense that we want something better.
For the paralytic to suddenly become well, he would have to be willing to face a whole new way of life. He would no longer be known as a helpless man. He would enter a world of new opportunities and new responsibilities. Even his relationships with others would be radically changed.
Likewise, if we truly hunger for the abundant life Christ promises, we’d better be willing to deal with the mindsets that keep us from becoming healthy and spiritually mature. There is a cost to be paid. It is here that many disciples turn back and settle for a life far below God’s intended plan. It is here that YOU must answer “do I want to be well?”
Ah, communication – that vital ingredient in all relationships. Done well, it can form bonds of greater union and cooperation. Done poorly it becomes a destructive weapon that can rip apart relationships and the very soul of another human being.
Communication is a tricky venture. While we often think of communication as speaking, words only account for about 7% of our “communication”. In fact, non-verbal clues such as body language, eye contact and tone “say” much more than our words. If body language conflicts with verbal language, the receiver is more likely to believe the non-verbal message. Thus eye contact, leaning into a conversation and an occasional attentive nod of understanding are important tools when communicating.
Another potential for frustration in the communication process stems from the simple fact that we all process words and their meanings through personal filters. We assume the receiver should understand our message exactly as we meant it, but this is rarely the case. The receiver processes your words and non-verbal clues through his or her own personal filter. That filter is based on similar experiences in his/her past. As a result, he or she may conclude that you meant something that you actually didn’t say. This is especially true when the receiver assigns feelings and motives to a message sent by the communicator.
Because communication has the potential to be so “messy”, skills such as active listening, reflection, and clarification are crucial when seeking to increase understanding, intimacy and cooperation.
Active listening requires us to give the sender our undivided attention. It means laying aside our own desire to formulate a response, assume we understand, or shut down the communication process. Authentic active listening can be one of the greatest demonstrations of love. It shows the other person that you care about their heart and their thoughts. It suggests a desire to genuinely “know” them.
Reflection refers to the ability of the receiver to speak back what s/he heard. The goal is to make certain that the correct message was received. In a sense, it is like mirroring back what you have heard said. The emphasis is on content of the message, but it is here that the receiver may also seek to identify the feelings and motives of the communication. (What was the intent and/or desired outcome?)
Finally, clarification allows the receiver to follow up with any relevant questions to ensure s/he has heard both the content and the intent behind the communicator’s message. This requires patience on the part of both parties, particularly in emotionally intimate relationships. Often we hear the words, but not necessarily the heart, behind them. In order to provide a “safe environment” for vulnerable communication, we need to refrain from judging, attacking, assuming, and belittling while working toward understanding, appreciation and ultimately love.
Learn more about other ways you may be sabotaging your communication.
“Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth” - 2 Timothy 2:15 (NIV).
“Study and be eager and do your utmost to present yourself to God approved (tested by trial), a workman who has no cause to be ashamed, correctly analyzing and accurately dividing [rightly handling and skillfully teaching] the Word of Truth” - 2 Timothy 2:15 (Amplified).
If Paul is encouraging Timothy to correctly handle the word of truth, then there must be incorrect ways to handle it as well. In fact, Paul mentions one wrong approach in verse 14 where he tells Timothy to warn believers against quarreling over words.
Sadly, many American believers are not even equipped with a “basic training” level when it comes to observing, interpreting and applying the word of truth. Few are genuinely familiar with Scripture. Instead, they settle to be spoon fed by leaders they follow. Rarely is there an emphasis on training disciples how to encounter God through the Word for themselves? Who wants to take the time to do that! It’s much easier to let someone else tell us what to believe, why, and how to apply it.
Of course, we have our favorite verses and our pet doctrines. We may even be quite skilled out spouting out verses that support our positions and refute “the opposition” (usually other denominations within His body). It doesn’t matter how these verses fit within their original context or the whole counsel of God. We just use them to argue against those “false teachers” we are convinced “do the devil’s works” and lead people astray. (Funny, that’s what Jesus was accused of doing in His day)!
The word of truth was never meant to be a weapon against other believers. It is only meant as a weapon against demonic forces – those powers that would have us believe and live contrary to God’s revealed truth. The Word must always be coupled with the Spirit which operates from pure motives and sincere love. It then confronts the true enemy of God’s people. I can’t help but wonder what would happen if we spent more time “battling in the heavenlies” instead of arguing or knit-picking with each other!
“But what about deception,” you might ask, “isn’t there a place to speak up”? Oh, absolutely. Bringing correction and even rebuking has its place, but it also has its methods, motivations and discernments! We must have confidence that, although we are warned about many false teacher, false prophets, false shepherds, etc., God is extremely capable of keeping His own. Those who genuinely want to know truth will find it because they are seeking HIM with all their hearts! Therefore, when we do speak, let it be God ordained and backed with His power!
For believers, God’s word is a surgical instrument – piercing and cutting away “the flesh” that is yet to be submitted to His Lordship. It is a lamp, guiding us into his truth. It is a beacon, calling us into times of fellowship where we can learn of Him when our hearts are truly open to know Him more.
In closing, keep in mind that even the demonic realm is aware of God’s word. Satan is seen misquoting and twisting Scripture. Furthermore, the religious leaders in Jesus’ day “searched the Scriptures” but missed the Savior whom those very Scriptures discussed. It is my hopes that as disciples, we will begin to hunger for the word of God like never before in my generation.
I pray we will get trained to accurately handle the word of truth. I hope that we will grow from dependence on church leadership and learn to feed from God directly. May our leaders train us how to discover God through His Word, may it become foundational within our churches.
NOTE: Coaching and training services offered through The Soul Care Center can help you grow in your ability to encounter God through Scripture study, prayer, journaling, service, etc. Our passion is to equip the Body of Christ!
1. I am wonderfully and fearfully made by a Holy God. (Ps. 139:14; Is. 17:7)
2. I am God’s workmanship – His masterpiece. (Eph. 2:10)
3. I am made in the image of God Himself – Christ, the hope of glory, dwells in me. (Gen. 1:26; Gen. 9:6; Col. 1:27)
4. I am thoroughly and completely forgiven. I stand clean and innocent before my God. (Acts 10:42-43; 1 John 1:9; Is 43:25-26; Ps. 103:12)
5. I am redeemed by God – called by name (Eph. 1:5-8; Is. 43:1)
6. I am a new creation - the old life is gone! I am being renewed and becoming like my creator. (2 Cor. 5:17; Col. 3:10)
7. I am greatly loved by God. I am His child. (1 John 3:1-2; Rom. 8:14-15)
8. I am an heir of God and co-heir with Christ (Romans 8:17; Gal. 3:29)
9. I am one of God’s people, a member of His family. (Eph. 2:19-20; Eph. 3:15)
10. I am blessed in the heavenly realm with every spiritual blessing. I am chosen to be part of a royal priesthood, a holy nation set apart for God. (1 Peter 2:9; Rev. 5:10; Eph. 1:3-4)
11. I am God’s - I belong to Him. I am committed to do good works (Rom. 1:6; Titus 2:11-14
12. I am His treasured possession. (Exodus 19:5-6; 2 Cor. 4:7)
13. I am chosen by God and sealed by His Spirit. (Eph. 1:11-14; 2 Thes. 2:13-14)
14. I am the apple of His eye – He delights in me! (Ps. 17:8; Deut. 32:10)
15. I am precious to God. I am being built into a spiritual house. (1 Peter 2:4-5; 2 Cor. 5:12)
16. I am a temple of the living God. (1 Cor. 3:16-17; 1 Cor. 6:19; 2 Cor. 6:16)
17. I am a participant of the divine nature – God lives in me. (2 Peter 1:3-4; 1 John 4:12)
18. I am full and complete - lacking nothing. (Col. 2:9-10; 2 Peter 1:3)
19. I am the righteousness of God. I am His ambassador. (2 Cor. 5:18-21; Heb. 11:7)
20. I am free. (Jn. 8:36; Gal. 5:1; Rom. 8:2)
21. I am healed, whole and sound. (1 Pet. 2:24; Mk. 10:52; Act 3:16)
22. I am more than a conqueror. I am led forth in victory. (Rom. 8:37; 1 Cor. 15:57)
23. I am a trained soldier, a warrior for Christ. (2 Tim. 2:3-4; 1 Cor. 9:7; Ps. 18:32-42)
24. I am the fragrance of Christ. (2 Cor. 2:14-15)
25. I am a member of His body. I am wanted and I am significant. (1 Cor. 12:27; Rom. 12:4-5)
26. I am a citizen of God’s Kingdom. (Heb. 12:28; Phil. 3:20)
27. I am sent by God. (Jn. 20:20-23; Rom. 10:15; Mt. 29:16-19)
28. I am light in the darkness. (Mt. 5:13-16; Eph. 5:8)
29. I am a friend of God, chosen by Him and appointed to bear good fruit that lasts. (Jn. 15:15-16)
30. I am His radiant bride. I am without spot or wrinkle. (Eph. 5:25-32; 2 Cor. 11:2)
I have this love/hate relationship with writing blogs. I truly enjoy writing, at least when it flows without much effort. But putting an expectation that I write on a regular basis – well, that just feels like plain work!
You see, as a mom, I have a very narrow window of time to sit down and put my thoughts “on paper”. Needless to say, the moment the kids are gone the first thing I find myself asking is “what do I need to do” or “what should I get done”? It is usually then that I tell myself to write. Talk about pressure.
Today, the Lord challenged me. He asked me what made me think that I was supposed to “do” anything. Maybe all He wanted was for me to sit still for a few moments and be with Him: undistracted; un-hurried; with no agenda but to love Him.
Well, wouldn’t you know that within moments my phone went off? Seems a dear sister was having a similar struggle. She wasn’t sure she could just be still. (Don’t you love confirmation?)
We often forget that our first ministry is TO Him. This is not to be confused with ministry FOR Him. God hungers for relationship with you. He doesn’t seek you so you will do stuff for Him. He seeks you so you will experience His love and pour it back to Him in humble adoration.
He longs to know you as you share your heart. He longs for you to know His.
How easy it is to get caught up in a flurry of activity? Yet if we have surrendered our lives to Him, this also means He gets to set the priority of how we spend our time.
This is not to say that there is never a time to “do” for the Lord, for our families, etc.
But Jesus said, “Seek first the Kingdom”! This only happens when we set our hearts on a pilgrimage to meet with God.
Before you fill your schedule with “to do” lists; goals; and activities – determine if you are really surrendered to God’s will. Is it okay if He calls you to “be still” and just sit with Him instead?
His delight is already in you – you don’t need to perform. You don’t need to be anxious about what does or doesn’t get done.
You simply need to be with Him, and then walk in obedience. He is a capable leader!
One action that originates from abiding in His will is worth more than a million actions done from your own effort!
I’ve stood on this plateau for many days now, aware of my restless condition. How much longer before we move on – away from the din of the town below?
My Lord has come to me, several times now – aware of my distress as I gaze upon the scene below. He has encouraged me to rest, to enjoy the beauty of the land now before me. It is a beautiful but desolate location – grassland stretching on for miles in most directions, a mountainous climb in another. It is where the Wilderness begins.
Yet, no matter how much I strive to rest for the journey ahead, I find my focus drifting to that town below. Perhaps I was the cause for the delay, I wondered. Could it be my heart had not yet left this little town below?
“Comfort” as it is called, had been a resting place on our journey. Here My Lord met with many of His people, speaking His truth, touching their hearts, expressing the depths of His great love for them. It was a place of fellowship, a place that seemed “protected” from the dangers of travel.
But it was time to leave. My Lord seldom stayed in one place for long. There were other people to reach and to love. There were lessons about the nature and purpose of My Lord that could only be taught on a journey. I knew this – and I shared this truth with great passion to all who might listen in Comfort.
So what is the source of my struggle? Why this discontent, this underlying agitation? I am increasingly certain that our journey is delayed until I unravel this mystery. While I have been restlessly waiting on My Lord to move, He has been waiting upon my heart.
I am no match for His wisdom. He knowingly meets my gaze and assures my understanding.
Why is it so hard to leave Comfort? What is it that My Lord wishes me to see? What must I surrender before moving on in the journey?
I know the source of my agitation, my frustration. It is the people who are staying behind. They seem so happy to know My Lord, so excited to have His presence. But they have no understanding, or no desire, to follow Him beyond the boundaries of Comfort.
They only enjoy Him when they know Him as a tame King. One that requires little from them yet gives much in return. I have tried to tell them they should come with us. They should get to know more about My Lord. But they insist He Himself will prefer to stay in Comfort.
The scene has played out so many times before. He has visited them, spent time among their many festivities as they sought His blessing. When He leaves, they will once more search for Him though out the town of Comfort, eager for His Presence, but only on their terms. They will wait. They will busy themselves with many activities, even many done in the name of their King. But they won’t follow after Him.
Am I jealous? Do I envy that they risk so little to “serve” their King? Perhaps - I am not certain.
I know I grieve. Some of those I deeply love have chosen to stay behind. “It is safe here in Comfort” – so they reason.
Yet it is more dangerous in Comfort, than here in the Wild. The King is here. His Sovereign protection and provision are more than sufficient.
In Comfort danger comes in far more subtle and deadly forms. Many are lulled to sleep. As they slumber their hearts are carried away to “Worldliness” – far from the life giving sustenance of My Lord. They build their homes, their very lives on a sinking foundation that will not stand the storms to come.
Danger also comes in the form of distraction. Here in the Wild one knows to remain alert, attentive to the surroundings and what may lurk within them. In Comfort it is easy to give attention to many things. Few are prepared when My Lord’s enemies attack. Fewer still know how to respond. Perhaps they have forgotten we live in a time of war.
I am aware I feel anger too – betrayed. I need my brothers and sisters to take up their positions. Don’t they understand what their decisions will mean for the whole Body and for the outcome of our Mission? Their absence will have a deep impact on many souls. There is a day, too, when they will give an account.
But I am reminded that I alone am responsible for my heart. I must live to be ready for the day when I, too, must give an account. There is no place to hold onto a critical, cold attitude toward those who stay behind. I allow My Lord to break my heart and replace it with His own pure heart.
I cry. I am not certain My Lord will visit Comfort again. I entrust those I love to the goodness of My Lord. I ask that a gift of great faith may be left behind, and that the called will find it.
My Lord, He is the desire of my heart, my treasure. I would find no joy to remain in Comfort while My Lord moves beyond the Wild. Though I desperately wish others would follow, I have chosen that I must release their future into the wise and loving hands of the King.
In the previous two blogs we discovered that Satan trembles when a believer has an undivided heart and radically pursues the Kingdom of God. We also examined how unity in the family creates an atmosphere where God’s Kingdom invades the earthly realm. Satan will stop at nothing to bring division in our own hearts and in our homes.
It stands to reason that he will also seek to tear down relationships built among the larger body of Christ. Just as he exploits areas of emotional and relational immaturity in a family, Satan will use the same tactics upon the Church at large. As we seek to move and mature in faith and love - Satan will seek to sow discord, strife, fear, and ultimately division.
He absolutely fears our unity. The book of Acts gives insight into the power of unity against the enemy. The Holy Spirit was poured out in power upon the united Body. There were healings, deliverances, and not one among the fellowship had unmet need. They were recognized as Christ’s disciples by their love for one another... and the LORD added daily to their number.
While Church growth programs today focus on “adding to our number,” perhaps it would be better to focus on unity birthed by love. Maybe when we get that right the Lord will add daily to our number.
Yet this writer clearly recognizes unity is no easy task, especially in our American culture. It does not take much effort on Satan’s part to bring division and discord. Ours is a culture that idolizes independence; that emphasizes “rights” and being right; that disconnects when offended.
It takes commitment, faith, emotional health and relational skills to walk in the pure love that produces unity.
While we may join together in a ministry related task – it is rare that we work to form solid relationships that can withstand the testing of time and tribulation.
I can’t help but wonder if maybe the early Church knew something we have long since lost. The simplicity of their fellowship – daily times of supping together, meeting for teaching, and most of all – prayer...could that have prepared their hearts for the unity that followed? Is that what brought them into “one accord” with one heart and mind – sharing the good news that Christ is alive and His Kingdom come?
Did those extended times of contact pave the way for an intimacy of hearts, solidarity in relationship, a security in knowing a whole community was committed to you? Will that not be how it is upon His return? He will rule and lead – we will follow as one.
Imagine, one army, standing united against the schemes and attacks of our foe.
Imagine, one army, moving together in love to enforce the victory of Calvary within our homes and communities.
Imagine, one army, serving our One Lord with joy, faith, love – unity!
Perhaps HE is waiting on us to “assemble” before He returns – just a thought!
Our enemy already knows the power, the blessing that will come when we mature to this level of Christ-like character. I am convinced our unity will be the sign of Satan’s imminent departure from the realm of earth.
Let us make it our goal to cooperate with the Holy Spirit to become the ONE displays the glory of our King.
Satan greatly fears unity within the individual Believer, the family and the larger body of Christ. In the previous blog we examined his efforts to sow division in the heart of a believer. A double-minded, uncommitted believer is no threat to the demonic forces that shadow our land.
There can be little doubt that he also sows division and discord within the family unit. Keep in mind that the family was God’s first “institution” designed to occupy the land and spread His Kingdom on earth. It is here where we learn intimacy, unconditional love, acceptance, selflessness, and even boundaries. It is within the family setting that Believers are stretched to consistently display the full array of the love of Christ to its members. It is here where each member lives “naked” before others.
So how does the enemy worm his way into Christian homes in efforts to prevent unity?
One tactic is to exploit emotional immaturity. Emotional health is not emphasized in our culture – including the church. It takes conscious effort to be aware of what we are feeling and “why”. Self-awareness is not given value or priority. Therefore, many of us grow up building a major wall of self-protection. We desperately try to “keep out” anything and anyone that hurts us.
However, it is impossible to live in a family and not get wounded. It’s what we do with these hurts that matters the most. In an emotionally healthy marriage, such wounds can open the door to greater intimacy. But when one or both spouses lack emotional maturity, the door to isolation and division is opened.
Unforgiveness, resentment, distrust, bitterness, fear, discouragement, and indifference begin to set the tone for the environment. Such families strive to remain “functional” in appearance, while lacking the health needed to support true unity. The full measure of Godly love is neither experienced nor given. We live far below God’s intent.
Satan will also take advantage of our lack of relationship building skills. We are a culture that: fights to be heard, yet rarely listens; blames quickly, yet rarely takes personal responsibility; values our rights above our relationships; and, simply does not know how to enter another’s world without selfish intent. We look to others to fill our needs, find our security, and provide us with a sense of identity and worth.
Adding to the hurt and isolation is the fact that many families live at such a fast pace that deep, meaningful interactions rarely takes place. We live in the same house more or less as strangers. At best we make small talk over trivial matters – trying to fix or connect on some minor issue. Relationships don’t go to a level of deep intimacy because we lack the commitment and skills need to really connect with another’s heart.
Satan deceives us into accepting this level of loneliness and disconnect as normal. While it is true that only Christ can meet all our needs, He has designed the family unit to provide intimacy and serve as the example of His desire for intimate fellowship with His creation.
In a family – each believer is confronted with his or her own inadequacy to live up to the standard of Christ. They are also exposed to glimpses of the fallen nature that still influence their spouse and children. What we do when faced with these realities will determine the success of satan’s tactics to divide.
Join us for part three to discover how satan stirs division among the larger Body of Christ.
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